healfrmdepress

An article about the power of survivors speaking out for suicide prevention was recently featured in the New York Times. A long-held taboo against talking about suicide attempts is being examined in an important step forward in the mental health community. The article states, “The nation’s oldest suicide prevention organization, the American Association of Suicidology, decided in a vote by its board last week to recognize a vast but historically invisible portion of its membership: people, like Ms. Stage, who tried to kill themselves but survived.”

According to the Times,  mental health organizations  historically have featured speakers who suffer from schizophrenia, bipolar disorder and depression. But until now, suicide has been virtually taboo, because of not only shame and stigma, but also fears that talking about the act could give others ideas about how to do it. “This is a real shift you’re seeing,” said Heidi Bryan, 56, of Neenah, Wis., who has been speaking for years about suicide attempts she made in the 1990s. “For people working in suicide prevention, they always told us not to talk about our own experience, like they were afraid to tip us over the edge or something. Honestly, we’re the ones who know what works and what doesn’t.”

About a million American adults a year make a failed attempt at suicide, surveys suggest, far outnumbering the 38,000 who succeed, and in the past few years, scores of them have come together on social media and in other forums to demand a bigger voice in prevention efforts. Plans for speakers bureaus of survivors willing to tell their stories are well underway, as is research to measure the effect of such testimony on audiences. The fact that a new group of people will now be talking openly about suicide is a great step forward for breaking the stigma around suicide. And the more the stigma is broken, the more likely it is that those who are thinking about killing themselves will choose to reach out for help.

For years I have said that key to recovering from depression is to never give up–to pick yourself up each time you fall. This truth was recently demonstrated and witnessed by millions of people when the American ice skater Jeremy Abbot had a severe crash within the first minutes of  his Olympic short program ice skating routine. For a moment he lay on ice, writhing in pain. It was unclear if he would get up. But buoyed by the cheers of the crowd, Abbot not only continued his program, but landed the next two jumps flawlessly.

In the post skate interview after the event, Jeremy said, “I think my personal story has always been about perseverance and always getting up when you fall, so maybe I’m not Olympic champion, but if nothing else I can teach to world that you can get up.”

The outpouring of public support was overwhelming, as Jeremy received dozens of amazing comment on his Facebook page.

What does this teach those of us who are struggling with depression and anxiety? It is to never give up. Every setback can be followed by a corresponding gain. As the Buddha said over 2,500 years ago, “Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.”

P.S. For those of you who did not see Jeremy’s amazing display of courage and grit, here is the video of the full program from NBC’s olympic website.

http://www.nbcolympics.com/video/abbott-finishes-after-frightening-fall

 

 

This is a wonderful Ted Talk by Dan Pink about the changing face of motivation and why it matters. It directly applies to the process of healing from depression.

Pink, a career analyst and writer, says that there is a “mismatch between what science knows and what businesses do.” Rather than the effort/reward incentive dynamic that has been used for decades, Pink makes the case for autonomy, mastery, and purpose as the best motivators. Simply put, doing what matters to you, matters. He defines autonomy as, “the urge to direct our own lives,” mastery as, “to get better and better at something that matters,” and purpose as, “the yearning to do what we do in the service of something greater than ourselves.”

This clearly applies to healing from depression. Because, in order to get well, we cannot wait for a doctor or mental health clinic to tell us what to do. Each of us, must become the director of our own self-directed recovery program. This is what I teach in my book Healing From Depression.  The motivation to get well comes from our deep desire to be relieved of our suffering. This leads us to trying tools and strategies that bring about wellness. The more we practice these mental health recovery strategies, the better we get at them, until we learn to be masters of the recovery process.

For years, I have been saying that one of the three keys to healing from depression is to have social support.  We cannot heal from something as overpowering as depression or anxiety in isolation.

The healing power of social support does not only apply to recovering from depression. Human beings are social animals, and we need each other to accomplish anything worthwhile. The truth of this principle recently played out in the 2014 Sochi Winter Olympics.

Nicole Pikus-Pace was attempting to do something she had never done before in the women’s Skeleton event–win a medal. Although she had been a World Cup and world championship medalist, she had never won an Olympic medal. In 2010 at Vancouver, she finished fourth, one-tenth of a second from bronze. In 2006, a serious injury kept her out of the Olympics in Torino.

But in 2012, Pikus-Pace came out of retirement one more time. Despite a history of injuries and setbacks,  she had something special going for her–the support of her parents, husband and two young children who had come to Sochi to cheer her on. When interviewed on television before her event, Nicole expressed how much fun she was having with her family all around her at the games. Taking in all of that love made her joyful and relaxed before her big moment. I thought to myself, “With all of the love and support Nicole is receiving, something good is bound to happen.”

Sure enough, Pikus-Pace finished a strong second behind Great Britain’s Lizzy Arnold. Moments after she crossed the finish line and clinched her Silver Medal, Nicole said, “It wasn’t just me crossing the finish line. I said ‘We did it.We did it.’ It wasn’t just me–it was a whole team!”

Click on the link below to see a photo of Nicole celebrating with her support team moments after winning the silver medal. The healing power of love and connection is a universal principle. Let’s continue to use it to heal from depression.

http://bleacherreport.com/articles/1960720-comeback-completed-noelle-pikus-pace-wins-medal-as-us-skeleton-flourishes

A fantastic TED talk I saw recently focused on the relationship between attitude and mood. It is called The Three A’s of Awesomeness: Attitude, Awareness, and Authenticity. Neil Pasricha is the author of the “Best Blog in the World” 1000 Awesome Things turned New York Times Bestselling author of the  The Book of Awesome: Snow Days, Bakery Air, Finding Money in Your Pocket, and Other Simple, Brilliant Thing. His message is simple: There are so many things to be happy about. He acknowledges that things go badly. Whatever the future holds, he says, “It ain’t going to go according to plan.” But he has mastered the art of focusing on the positive and reading his daily description of awesome things. Focusing on what is going well is a good prescription for helping to have a better mood.